Reading, Writing, Reflecting

I'm sure that S3 will be won over by the sheer wonderfulness of the blog here. But until they do, there is just the three of us keeping this going for those who miss the class.

Today we looked at personal, reflective writing skills. These are vital because they make up a sizeable chunk of exam questions, they can be used in your folios this year and next, and when you are famous rock stars, footballers and beauty therapists you'll want to be able to write your autobiography.

The keen beens amongst you have signed up for the emailed weekly synopsis of the lessons. If not, just remember this:

• Emotions, emotions, emotions!


• Make it vivid, improve, improve, improve it


• A nice way to catch the readers attention is to include all 5 senses in the first paragraph, to describe feelings, but also to keep a sense of tension to encourage the reader to read on!

Next week you're going to be putting this into practice under exam conditions on Thursday. The question is Choose a time in your life when you have experienced conflict. Write about this, and remember to include your thoughts and feelings. You'll have an hour and ten minutes, but feel free to prepare as much or as little as you want to.

But as you sow, so shall you reap.

Also next week, we'll find out whether Millington is guilty or innocent in Conduct Unbecoming, we'll watch as much of the video as we can get through, and on Monday, we'll be doing a group talk graded task. More on that next week.

Finally, homework. Creative writing pieces are due on Thursday, 13th March - write a story in which one of the central characters experiences a conflict. However, none of the main characters can be a human.

Tuesday 19th. Essay evaluation, Learning old words

Today Mr.Sharpe decided we should see the first draft of our "Conduct Unbecoming" essays.
He showed some good examples of introductions and basically we are to use as many liking sentences/paragraphs as possible. See last post for good examples and what linking paragraphs are. The introductions are not to be too short and should be clear as to what you are going to do. Easy.

In our essays we are NOT to tell Mr. Sharpe how hard we worked on our essays or how long, this is because he doesent care. What a meanie.

We also spent a while talking about "there, they're and their".
There is the opposite of here we can remember this because of the "here" in "there".
They're is an abbreviation of "they are" you should know this though.
Their is typically used when talking about objects, e.g. "This is their house."

How comforting it is to know that 3rd years cannot understand this, so if you were wondering whether Standard Grade English is hard, question answered.

N.F.

S3 - Essay Feedback

Hi everyone.

I'm sure no-one will be checking back here during the holidays, but in case you are..

Essay feedback - good examples from good pupils! Feel free to modify ideas to improve your own work!

Introductions

"Conduct Unbecoming" is a play of honour, mystery and romance. Written by Barry England, "Conduct Unbecoming" has all the potential to be a good, mysterious play. At the outset of the drama script we are introduced to two characters, Millington and Drake, who are throughout the book, contrasted with each other. Drake is made to seem optimistic, serious and very ambitious. Millington, on the other hand, is seen as slightly pessimistic, has a laid back attitude and has the desire to fail and be rejected. Act one ends with Millington being accused and arrested of a crime he seems oblivious to. - KA

"Conduct Unbecoming" is a play written by Barry England. It is set in India during the 1880s. It is about two young subalterns on probation in the army. The two main characters couldn't be more different. Milington, the son of a general is trying to make the worst possible impression on the officers of the regiment so he can get dismissed and go back to England. Drake, the son of a major wants to make the best possible impression and from the minute he and Milington arrive he is apprehensive that Millington's mocking and ironic behaviour will reflect badly on him. - AA

Linking paragraph

In this essay I aim to establish the contrasts between Drake and Millington. Firstly, I will look at the respect for tradition, then on to the differences in humour. I will look at their behaviour and manners. I will then look at their respect for women. Finally I will look at ambition of both Drake and Millington. - LJ

In my essay I aim to demonstrate how Millington and Drake are contrasted throughout act one. Firstly, I am going to do this by compparing their speech. I will go on to illustrate the differences in their actions and intereaction with other characters, and finally I will show how their backgrounds contrast and why this is important. - HI

Main Ideas

Millington is demonstrated in the play to be a troublemaker. He is a misogynist who likes to use and abuse women. - AP

Earnest Drake is contrasted with Millington's casual manner. - JM

Conclusions

Therefore, in conclusion, Drake and Millington are complete opposites. This is shown throughout Act one in their behaviour, actions, speech and thoughts towards the mess and people in it. Drake is generally earnest and formal, however Millington is generally casual and ignorant. I have proved that Millington and Drake are contrasted greatly throughout act one. Even so, they will be measured as one:
“Unfortunately, we shall be judged together” – MM

S3 - Conduct Unbecoming essay

We looked at a good example of a piece of critical writing which (a) analyses the text/engages with the language - this is in blue to make it stand out, and (b) discusses how character is both established and developed - this is in brown. Look also at how the last sentences in the good example constantly link the ideas back to the question. We also looked at a bad example.

Good example

When Drake is first introduced to the audience, even before his first words, he is established as a man for whom being an officer has been a lifetime ambition:

“Drake looks about as a man finally at peace.” p5

The impression created is that he has found his Shangri-La, somewhere that he has known existed , or perhaps considers that he has arrived in his idea of heaven. It is suggested that his character is one which will blend into the regiment.

This initial characteristic is developed later in the scene. His arrival at the mess has almost over-awed him, and he describes the experience:

“It is like … coming home” p5

The stage direction calls for this to be delivered “quietly”, and the ellipsis suggests Drake is struggling to find the words to describe his feelings. His character is established at this point as having always wanted to be a military man.

Bad Example

Millington is a nightmare. When he turns up, he says “How very uplifting for you.” But he says this in a sarcastic way. This shows that he is a sarcastic character.

Millington is also very disrespectful of military traditions …

S3 - Essay Title and Help Sheet

Conduct Unbecoming - a whodunnit with a historical message that is every bit as relevant today as it ever was!

This week, S3 will be writing their critical essays about the establishment and development of their chosen character: either Millington or Drake, or a comparison between the two.

If you missed previous lessons, handouts are available here ... http://docs.google.com/Doc?id=dfxsh979_1hdhv55gx - click the link for a copy of the essay sheet from Google Docs