New Website

Hello Frequent Fliers,

Anyone keen to see what I've been doing with my long summer holiday, the new site is now up and running (but stilll under development...) at www.mrsharpetheteacher.com.

It's been a chore, I used software from www.coffeecup.com and I'm not sure yet whether I recommend it. I also bought an imac, and don't recommend that either! Matthew (and other techies) will appreciate I've been hoping between Mac and Windows environments, and running Vista through Parallels in Mac too. It's been a test of nerve!

Holidays!!!!

Hey everyone

According to my stalker-like visitor trackers, some of you are coming back to this blog even though (a) it's the holidays, and (b) I've left your school.  Good on you.

I'm really sad to have left, but of course you can keep using this site for help across all the different English levels.  Over the summer I'll be upgrading this blog to a full website, and so check back as new things happen.  And I bought a shiny new imac, so all sorts of "creative" things should be possible!

Thanks for being such wonderful pupils this year.  Keep watching the skies, and remember - Mr Sharpe likes GOOD QUALITY COFFEE!!

The Intermediate Two Rap

So let me tell you about Intermediate two

It's the bestest thing that anybody can do

There's spelling, analysis, punctuation and grammar

And if you don't pass this you could end up in the slammer

We learned new skills like textual analysis

And how every word counts, except for words like "as" and "this"

Brooklyn Cop - that's a poem that's sweet

About an ape with a nightstick who patrols all the streets

There's lots of exams, tests, NABs and trials

Where you have to work hard or Mr Sharpe'll get viol...

...ent because he wants you to pass and to get a good grade

Or the boys'll get neutered and the girls'll be spayed

Over summer you'll be reading for your personal study

That book'll soon become your bestest buddy

It can be about a story, a poem or a play

And then write it all out in a double one day

The course ends in May with two exams

So you'd better be doing all that revision we planned

Two critical essays and a close reading passage

The back home for chicken soup and a relaxing massage.

Yeah, boyee.

Rapid Response - Crisis Management!

Hi S2

Next week you'll be given a double lesson to complete the design, script and all other preparation for the news bulletin on the hurricane in Honduras. Remember, you need to make sure that the public are informed of the facts, but also you are trying to get them to think about how they might best help.

Some statistics from the hurricane:

• 11,000 dead (that is about 13 times the total number in our school)


• 1 million homeless (that's like everyone in Edinburgh and Glasgow being made homeless at once)


• Winds speeds were 180 miles per hour


• There are over 22,000 refugee camps with no basic clean water or sewage system


• The highways have collapsed, and most major roads are unpassable


• There is no clean water supply - you can live for about 3 days without clean water. If you drink dirty water, you could get terrible diseases, and...


• ...hospitals, schools and major institutions are all destroyed, and many doctors, policemen and teachers are amongst the dead

Seven Steps to Poetry Heaven

Hey Folks

Analysis of text? Follow the seven steps to heaven, as discussed yesterday.

http://www.box.net/shared/tk49brpk4k

Clickety click.

Yellow bellied, tree huggin', pocket mulchin' hippy music

Hey folks from S4

If you are stuck for ideas with you "Environmental Poetry Presentations, some ideas are below

Ben Harper - "Excuse Me Mr"


Jack Johnson - "The Horizon has been Defeated"




Tom Waits - "Murder in the Red Barn"




Dave Matthews Band - "Don't Drink the Water"
(This rocks particularly well!)



REM - "The End of the World as we know it"
(not much about the environment, but a bit..)

S5 - Your first Textual Analysis

Hi Everyone and welcome to MrSharpeTheTeacher. If you promise to keep coming back, I promise to keep running this as a useful resource for you to become excellent!

Look at the picture I've embedded here - what do you see? Do you see an old woman, or a beautiful young lady?

The truth is, both are there. This is an optical illusion, and if you look hard enough, suddenly you can clearly see one, then the other.

So here's my point: the answers are always there on the page - you just need to look. Sometimes you need to squint a bit, sometimes change your point of view slightly. And there's no wrong answer, just a range of right ones with varying levels of justification.

If you are still with me, well done. If not, we'll try something else!

Test Answers

You had a wee shot at a textual analysis piece on Thursday. Hopefully you were instructed to come to this blog for the answers, which are below.

Don't cheat. I don't mind if you get them all wrong, or all right. No one wins, no one gets eaten by a lion. What is important here is that we (you and I) work out what skills you already have, and what needs work.

1 a) his wife had an accident (1 mark)
b) the gatekeeper (1)
c) what has happened to her (1)

2 a) water (1)
b) "torrent", "bobbed" (1 for each)
c) reference to "a tap had been turned on inside her" and "a gush of words" (1 for each)

3 a) women - some kind of gloss on "heavy flesh trembling on cheeks and chin" + quote. Son - gloss on "gaunt, high cheekboned face" + quote (3)

4 It contradicts itself (oxymoron) (2)

5 a) vain, glamorous, conscious of her appearance (1), outgoing, sociable, independent (1) - any of the above ideas for one mark each, total of 2)
b) disapproves "any decent woman" or "i told her it wasn't right" or "a judgement" (1)
6 a) they live with her (1)
b) tries to follow her son when he goes to see Sylvia (2)

7 a) there is a large age-gap (15 years) (1)
b) "words had never come easily to him" or "inarticulateness" or "wordless misunderstanding" (1 for any one)

8 a) (the horror of) what has happened to Jock's wife (1)

9 a) reference to "this'll cure her vanity" (1)
b) variety (1)

10a) "like a woman's hair" (1)
b) story is about the accident involving Sylvia's hair (1)

11 anything along the lines of how much he loves her (1)

12 reference to the domination of the mother, Sylvia's striving for glamour and/or independence and Jack appearing to be caught in the middle. (2)

Well done for getting this far! Total marks are out of 30.